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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

6 hours of intensity

Re-deem
1.a. To buy back b. To win back
2. a. To free what distresses or harms b. to free from captivity by payment of ransom c. To release from blame or debt d. To free from consequence of sin

So today was really amazing!  God definitely sent my heart some encouragement today.  We did not go to campus today because we had a guest speaker come and well speak to us.  His name is Sy Rogers and he came to talk to us about well sexual stuff.  The staff warned us that it was going to be intense, and not to mention a 4 day talk crammed into 6 hours.  He addressed a lot of the issues that most churches are either afraid to talk about or just wont.  
There is no way I would be able to tell you everything we discussed cuz it was one crazy 6 hours but so worth it.  Sy used to be a homosexual.  His mother died when he was a child, he was molested by her partner, his dad sent him away to live with some people cuz he thought it was best for him, he felt abandoned...he started having attractions but wasn't gay but people told him he must be gay and that he should embrace it...so eventually he did...later in life he actually almost got a sex change...but long story short God interrupted his plans and came into a relationship with the Lord...He said he was redeemed.  He told us that his attractions just didn't magically go away but he wanted God more...he never gave up because God meant more...Now he has been married for 25 years and has been in full time ministry for 30.  Now this is way abrieviated but if you ever get the chance to hear this mans story then you will understand just how amazing it is!
He talked a lot about how many Christians used to try to reach out to him...but he always felt like they didn't really care, they just wanted to argue.  Or how no one tried to help him with his sexual thoughts...they just immideitly dismissed him and said those thoughts are sinful, you are wrong...how often to we "Christians" do that...I realized that it is far more often than any of us would ever admit.  How many people won't come to church because of a similar experience.  How many people will never step foot inside a church or never give Jesus the time of day because we have made them feel that their sin makes them inadequate.  Well I wish it wasn't like this because God knows every sin of every person ever made.  And if he chose to tell the world what some of us, yes even the most Godly people, I don't think any of us would ever judge anyone else ever again.  For example, take all of the people Jesus saves from sexual sin alone in the Bible...The woman at the well, who had 5 lovers, Mary Magdaline, the woman caught in adultery (which is my favorite because the pharisees try to trap Jesus by bringing the woman to him and saying the law of moses says to stone her, what do you say, and my man kneels in the sand and just starts writing, writing, and he says you who are without sin throw the first stone...point being those pharisess were just as dirty as her).  We need to not dismiss these issues, but come to terms with the fact that they are real and help people deal with them.  The reason Sy is walking with Christ today is because someone CARED enough to pull him aside and share the gospel with him, not rebuke him.
He addressed so much about our sinful nature, sexual sin and not just the act, how its about our thoughts and our behaviors...it was a really great talk...but you know one thing that gripped me was when he was talking to us about how as human beings most of us do not feel good in our skin, whether that be sexually or just in terms of who we are...and you know I know I struggle with coming to terms of how God made me and feeling good about myself, and no I don't mean sexually I mean just me being me.  I am a typical silly girl! I listen to satan when it comes to me and the lies that our society loves to tell...I live across the street from a victoria secret where there are posters up of these picture perfect women with picture perfect bodies, or if only more that 8 of us in the world could be picture perfect.  This is my blog so I am not even going to pretend that I am afraid to be vulnerable because im so not!  This is me, I am real, and I have real struggles...This insecurity of mine has never been a physical disorder thank God but it sure is a mental one...I might come across as a confident person but I tear myself up 98 % of the time.  And it is so amazing that he chose to address this because one of the things I wanted God to show me this summer is to try to see myself the way he sees me.  That he will redeem my thoughts! I am his daughter, he made me...being an artist I know what it is like to intentionally make something a certain way...to put so much love and effort into a piece...God is an artist...we are all products of his work...and God doesn't make something without putting great thought in it...I know this is going to be a struggle for me that is just not going to go away like magic...as Christians there are certain things each of us struggle with that will rear its ugly head a us throughout our life...But I want God more.  I fail so often at so many things and the only reason I don't throw in the towel is because I want God more! He is sufficient, he is a redeemer, he satisfies and justifies...and while we will still struggle in life, its ok because HE WILL see us through...and he allows us to struggle because it only makes us stronger...and he understands when we hurt because there is NOTHING he has not experienced for us!
So yeah I totally wish you could have heard this talk...there is sooooo much more to it than what I have addressed but I really think it will help me relate to the suffering world that is right outside my door...I am so excited about going on campus tomorrow and telling people that Jesus LOVES them so much it is ridiculous and it doesn't matter what you have done, where you have been, there is no sin to dirty that he can not cover, he is a healer, a lover, a father, a redeemer, and he wants to bring us back and restore our lives...he is for the un-loveable, rejected, beaten, wounded, abused, mistreated, lonely, no direction, homeless, heartless, weary, the empty...he wants us...no matter what...there is no sin to terrible that he hasn't already paid for!

"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
~Romans 5:6-8

www.syrogers.com

PS. and I went running tonight in central park(I had company no worries) and it was awesome...we ran there which is pretty far, well maybe only a mile somethin and ran there and it was soooo what I needed...I just prolly do that more...and thats all!

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