8 months later and its still where I want to be!

If you are reading this blog for the first time, I hope you will continue reading past this post. Perhaps it would give you some insight into why I am so obsessed with New York City and why my heart longs to be there so badly!

Yes, its been around 8 months since Project and I am just now updating the blog with our stats from the summer. We gathered all of this info one of the last days...this is just what was recorded...annnd its pretty awesome!

715 Conversations were initiated.

526 Spiritual conversations

254 people heard the Gospel

15 people placed their faith in Christ (at least)

1,700 Bibles,cd's,water bottles were handed out with info on how to know God personally....this in no way sums up every person we encountered or how the Lord used our team to impact His Kingdom for HIS glory! This summer changed my life and will forever grip my heart! To all of you who supported me, thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!!......fast forward to the PRESENT.....

When I left for New York last summer, I had no idea that I would fall in love with that city. I have never been to a city bigger than Atlanta, I grew up in a small town, and even went to school in a small town. Despite my doubts, I adjusted really well, and fell in love with the City and its people. God gave me a huge passion for what Campus Crusade does there. Ever since my third week on Project I knew that I could see myself doing ministry in New York for a year. The second I left I wanted to go back...and that has not changed, in fact the desire has only grown. This past fall I began praying about going on Staff with Crusade for a year (this is what Crusade calls STINT or an INTERN) in New York. I can not express to you the urgency I feel to be there. I think about it all the time!

So I finally applied on March 1st! The weeks since then have been tormenting. I realized that if I did not get accepted, I wouldn't know what to do...I have wanted this so bad, for so long. As time drug on, I questioned why God would give me such a huge desire for the city if I wasn't supposed to be there. I guess you could say my frustration also came from just being in a place of "waiting". You see I have just moved home because I couldn't find a job. I have been waiting on Crusade, waiting on direction, and opportunity.

This past Tuesday and Wednesday were rough...I was trying to be patient but failing. I was tired of waiting. I wanted to know so I could move forward or move on. Oh what a sad story it is when we tire of waiting on the Lord. I realized that no matter how agonizing it was, God had me waiting for a reason! I found so much comfort in knowing that He knew what was going on and I had a feeling that things were about to fall into place.

Today when I got home from work I had an email from Crusade. Letting me know that I have officially been accepted to Intern with Campus Crusade starting this fall. I am beyond excited, and astonished at how amazing God's timing is! This was worth the wait. God is so faithful!

However the wait is not over...if anything its about to get more intense. You see just because I have been accepted does not mean I automatically get to go. Just like many of our worlds missionaries, I too have to raise support. Not sure the exact amount but I hear it is around $44,000......yeah, thats a lot! Every time I say the number out loud I feel like I just punched myself in the chest. Support raising is not comfortable, and that much money scares the mess out of me. But God is so much bigger than that number. IF he wants me there, I will be there and thats all there is to it. These next couple of months are going to be crazy. With Caswell starting up soon and me beginning the support process.

If you are reading this, I hope you will pray for the process I am about to enter into. That whether I go or not, that God will be glorified. To whichever, there is a purpose. I pray that I raise the support and get to go but the truth is that God is good, even if I don't. Pray for the students of New York! The city with millions of people yet it feels dark and empty. Pray for Crusade's ministry with the students of New York. There are over 1 million college students in New York City, and out of the 100+ colleges, you might be lucky to find a single bible study in 12 of them. The students of New York need to be reached with the reality of the love of Christ.

My heart is all in...ready, set, go...lets see what happens...

"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen."-1Peter4:11 (however, all of chapter 4 is pretty fantastic!)

Ephesians 3:7-9

less than the least

~Megan

Recap

So my beautiful 5 year old Mac Power Book G4 has gone to computer heaven. I really don't think there is anything anyone can do. I am pretty sure it was hard drive failure...so sad times, but it served me well. With that said, I have not been able to blog as much (so sorry) but I am borrowing my roomates computer so I can update.

Wednesday was our last day on campus :( it was hard to say good bye to the people we had become close with. We also had some really neat conversations. Aaron, Matt, and I were a team and we were just handing out bibles in the cafeteria when we came to this table of two guys and two girls, we asked them if they wanted some free bibles and they said why not. Then they just started asking all of these really great questions...we didn't even have to bring up spiritual things, they did it for us. Most of them had a Catholic background but they all said they weren't that "religious". We talked for such a long time with them and went through the gospel and the KGP with them. They were so interesed, one of the girls even said that she wanted to pray to recieve Christ later by herself. It was such an amazing conversation, we talked with them for so long and it was just great! It was hard saying goodbye to Kingsborough, im pretty sure I'll be back at somepoint though...New York has a part of my heart now.

Thursday was an office day. We did stats and organized all of the contacts that we have gathered the past 5 weeks and sorted through all of the surveys. It was really cool to see how many people my ministry team alone talked to. God uses the insignificant, that is for sure! I am excited to hear what the stats are for the campus track and the entire project, it really puts things in perspective. Later in the day I actually got to see my good friend Joey Waters, who was in the city for the day with the Deep Impact staff. I only got to see him for like 10 minutes but it was so good, a familiar face is so comforting this place, even if just for a few minutes!

Friday we had our last outing with our international students. Our Chinese friends cooked for us...they cooked hot pot for us which is spice and you put raw stuff like fish and veggies in a boiling pot of spices and it was soooo good! seriously the best and most authentic Chinese food I have ever had.

The fam came in this weekend, it was so cool to be able to show them the city...even though I don't really know my way around as well as I thought. I wanted to take them to yogurt land so bad and then I couldn't find it. It was bad and I was so sad because yogurt land is so good! But we had fun and I think they enjoyed the city, even though it prolly overwhelmed them a bit. They all really enjoyed Central Park. I LOVE YOU FAMILY :)

Please be in prayer for my Sunday...Aaron and I are taking Chris (the guy that came to Christ at Kingsborough) to church tomorrow and after that we are meeting up with some other students from Kborough to go to the art show that is put on by the Arts Track...it is designed to be an outreach tool so please pray that God will provide some productive conversations. I am excited about Church because I am going to Grafitti Church, the Baptist State Convention helps support that church so I am excited about going. And the art show is going to be awesome, so yeah tomorrow is going to be way fun. Anyways hope you enjoyed the run down, until next time!

"If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" ~2 Corinthians 5:17

Today was a typical Tuesday morning.  We met at the space, prayed, gathered our supplies, and my team headed out to City Tech in Brooklyn.  We were able to get into the college again this week, which was such a blessing.  We decided to split the girls and boys up so I went with Tay and Jenny.  For the first "soularium attempt" Jenny stayed behind and handed out free books/bibles/water bottles while Taylor and I approached a girl.  We asked her if she would take our picture survey.  We went through Soularium with her, she said she believed in God but didn't understand how so many people said that they felt him or how he helped them in troubled times.  So I asked her if she thought it was possible to have a personal relationship with him...she responded with an "I don't know".  At this moment, while still conversing with this girl I hit Taylor on the leg, which was me saying "quick get out the KGP"...so she did and home girl rocked it. P.S. this girl is 19 and since being on project has become one of the most bold people I have ever met, its great!  Anyways so Taylor goes through the KGP with her and we get to the part with a diagram of two circles...the circle on the left has the self on the throne and Christ is outside of the circle...the circle on the right has Christ on the throne (inside the circle) and self is at the foot of the throne...in other words Christ is in your life and in the center of your life.  We asked her which circle she thought she was in...she said, well I guess I am in the middle.  I took this opportunity to chime in and ask her what she thought about thinking of it as a pregnancy...your either pregnant or your not, there is no halfway pregnant.  She quickly responded saying that she was definitely the one on the left but wanted to be the one on the right.  Taylor then showed her the model prayer of what you can pray if you want to receive Christ.  She took the KGP and right there she accepted Christ into her heart...it was really really cool!  We got to give her a Bible and I got to share with her one of my favorite passages in the Bible (2 Corinthians 5) and I read to her the part of being a new creation.  That because we accept Christ into our lives we no longer have to do it on our own, we don't have to strive for unattainable perfection to try to turn our life around because Christ comes in and does it for us...changing us from the inside out, and making us a new creation.  She smiled and we talked for a while before she had to go to class.  This was our last day at City Tech and it was so amazing that God let us be a part of that...I am still speechless!

After lunch we got to share with two girls who were already believers.  It was so encouraging to meet them!  We have met several people who are believers and we are hoping that there is enough interest to start a Bible study there in the fall.  The Lord has totally been at work at City Tech and he is so not done!

Tonight we had Bible Study at Ansley's house.  She cooked Lasagna for us and some pretty tasty chocolate cake.  It was so nice to get away from the city and have a home cooked meal, in a real house!  Bible study was just as refreshing and comforting!  We had some great discussion and the Lord really encouraged my heart through that.  We also laughed a lot :)

Tomorrow is our last day at Kingsborough and of our campus ministry.  This makes me so sad, I feel like I have just gotten to know the students there and now we have to leave!  But God is in control and who knows maybe I'll end up back here for a year and get to re invest in those people (yep that is something im going to be praying about for the next couple months) but regardless I know God has done so much! I am so thankful to be a part of it and I can't wait to see what tomorrow holds.  PLEASE PRAY that God will use is in many significant ways...please specifically pray for our friend Constansza who many of us have talked to and whom I have become friends with...we really wanted to see her come to Christ or at least some significant progress in her thought process before we left.  But we at least want to be able to say bye to her and give her some resources (like a case for Christ...we have been carrying one with her name on it for like a week now).  PRAY for Kingsborough!

Free gifts

So I can't believe that this is our last full week here! It is so bitter sweet! I can not wait to get back to Caswell but I really really don't want to leave the city, im sort of in love with it!

The past several days have been pretty sweet.  Friday we went to a Coney Island Cyclones game (minor team of the Mets) with our international buddies...except my international buddy couldn't come so I invited Chris(the guy who came to Christ the other day) instead.  I thought it would be good for him to meet some fellow believers...Aaron sat with us and we all had a lot of fun.  They shot off fireworks after the game, and they played America The Beautiful by Ray Charles...For those of you who know me pretty well, you know that the Sandlot is my all time favorite movie so this was an exciting moment for me.

Saturday (JULY 4th) I slept in (praise the Lord), hung out/threw the friz in central park.  That night we went down to the Hudson with the rest of New York's population and some...seriously millions of people.  It was sorta frustrating...but once the fireworks started I was just a tad bit amazed! The fireworks were INSANE! SUNDAY I WENT TO A YANKEES GAME :) I think I am an official Yankees fan now.  I loved the game, it was so much fun!  The Yank's played the Blue Jays...beat them 10-8, shoulda smoked um even more than that but you know how it goes.

TODAY

Today was such a great day!  We started off the day with a history lesson about the New York City Metro Team.  We learned when it started, how it has evolved, and what the vision has been and what it is for the future.  They would love to see some of us come to NYC on stint (year long staff intern) or eventually come on staff...to make a long story short, the need is so great here!

Today my team decided to do a give a way table.  So we gathered all the stuff we needed, books, bibles, high lighters, water bottles, laundry bags...AND since we had so much stuff, we got to take a cab out to Kingsborough which was cool because we are always underground when we go there, it was cool to see the commute above ground...it was beautiful.  We get there, set up, and not even 30 minutes later had given away all of our stuff/done a lot of surveys...it was really neat.

However I did notice something that sort of got me thinking.  I noticed that there were tons of people that just kept right on walking.  We were saying "free stuff, its free, free free free,  would you like some free stuff?"   and no matter how free it was, still people kept right on walking.  I have done the same thing before, especially on campus...somebody is  handing out free stuff and I usually don't give them the time of day, much less take time out of my schedule to take their survey.  I feel like this relates so much with Salvation.  Here is this free gift...Jesus gives it FREE, no strings attached, you can't earn it, purchase it, or lose it...its just  free and all you have to do is take it.  Yet people walk on by, turn their nose up, and just don't take it.  

After the table was done  Aaron and I had a follow up session with Chris.  We had lunch with him and just talked with him about how he was processing his decision to follow Christ.  We talked with him about assurance of salvation and all kinds of stuff.  It was very challenging at times because we had to break down every little thing.  However towards the end of the conversations I could tell that he understood a lot more which was really cool. AND when we asked him on a scale of 1-10 how sure he was of his eternal salvation and he said 10 really enthusiastically!   it was so great!

Tonight we had our monday night meeting and it was inner city's night to lead.  They did such a wonderful job.  We ate, sang, were spoken too, prayed, and then we went with our dinner groups out to give homeless people bag dinners.  It was so neat...we had some good responses and some not so good  responses, but overall it is going to be an experience I won't forget and one that has taught me a lot about how I need to treat others, especially the homeless!

so anyways thats a basic rundown of the coolness but im so tired and its 2:03 am and i am wondering what in the world I am doing still typing right now so goodnight!

"Taste and see that the Lord is good, blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him"-Psalm34:8

The past several days have been so amazing!  At every college we went to we had really significant spiritual conversations.  God has really blessed our time every day...throughout the summer each person has had at least one deep spiritual conversation every day...thats a lot of conversations!

I just want to share with you something that happened on Wednesday.  Please be mindful that I don't share this to bring myself glory because I am so insignificant in this...it is all because of Jesus and glory belongs to God!  I share this because what happened has really blessed my life and is just one of the examples of how God is so faithful to obedience, even if you have to wait a really long time...not to mention how he orchestrates EVERYTHING so perfectly!

So God had really been laying it on my heart to fast...he would not let me get it off of my mind...so after a lot of praying I decided to start Wednesday after breakfast and end Thursday at 3.  during this time  I specifically wanted to remember the students at Kingsborough because my heart has really been burdened for them and just re-focus spiritually.  So yeah we get to Kingsborough Wednesday and I got paired up with a girl named Dani(she is part of the Boston summer project, they came to visit us) and we tried to talk to like three different people but got shot down pretty fast :( but God had far bigger plans.  So I see the lifeguards out on the kingsborough beach, and I was like oooo lifeguards, I love lifeguards, lets go talk to them (cuz there was no one in the water of course and they were chillin like professional lifeguards).  So we did, one dude and two dudets.  We did Soularium with them, and it was an ok conversation, but I could tell it wasn't going to go where we wanted it too...as soon as I thought that out of no where this guy comes up to us.  He came to say hello to the lifeguards but ended up joining our conversation and soon he and I were engaged in a deep spiritual conversation.  We talked for at least an hour.  Chris had a Catholic background and kept saying he knew a lot about what I was saying, he said he prayed and went to church.  I went through the KGP booklet with him and he was so into it...I could tell he had never heard the gospel before (grown up in church and never heard the whole gospel, ugh).  I got to talk with him about what he thought God's standard was for letting us into heaven and of course his answer was "be good, try the best you can, pray, and go to church", I then shared with him that since we are human we are not good no matter how hard we try and we will always fall short...and we have to ask Jesus to come in our heart and become our savior, and have a personal relationship with him.  He agreed with all of this but still kept going back to the whole works mindset...we talked about it for a long time until he finally said, well I want what you are talking about...and right there on the beach Chris prayed to receive Christ.  I can't believe Jesus let me be apart of something like this and I am so thankful and encouraged by that.  Chris is coming with our group to a baseball game on Coney Island today.  I am hoping to introduce him to my guy friends...and hopefully we will have the opportunity to talk with him more, and try to help him understand more about his new faith.  I think something most people struggle with when someone comes to Christ is if that decision was really legit...only them and God truly know but we are responsible to follow up and love on that person.  So yeah I am so excited for that!

I say all this to express how stinking awesome Jesus Christ is...not like we didn't already know that but seriously! This experience reminded me of how perfect his ways are!  He orchestrated everything so perfectly! I had recently been so discouraged because out of all the years that I have shared my faith, I have never seen anyone come to Christ...it has reminded me that its all on His time, not mine!  I find it crazy that the day I decide to go on a fast...God brings another child into his family by using an insignificant person like me!  It reminds me that if we can just empty ourselves of OURSELVES than there is more room for God to use us!  And if God is telling you to do something, DO IT!  Then just sit back and watch because you are going to be amazed!

^"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen."

1 Peter 4:11

1 Timothy 1:3-17

 ³As I urged you when I went into Macedonia, stay there in Ephesus so that you may command certain men not to teach false doctrines any longer ⁴nor to devote themselves to myths and endless genealogies. These promote controversies rather than God's work—which is by faith. ⁵The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. ⁶Some have wandered away from these and turned to meaningless talk. ⁷They want to be teachers of the law, but they do not know what they are talking about or what they so confidently affirm.

 ⁸We know that the law is good if one uses it properly. ⁹We also know that law is made not for the righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful, the unholy and irreligious; for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers,¹⁰for adulterers and perverts, for slave traders and liars and perjurers—and for whatever else is contrary to the sound doctrine ¹¹that conforms to the glorious gospel of the blessed God, which he entrusted to me.

 ¹²I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service. ¹³Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. ¹⁴The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.

 ¹⁵Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. ¹⁶But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life. ¹⁷Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen.

Believers vs. the church

So the past two days have been pretty encouraging.  A lot has happened.  Much ministry, much fun, and much learning.  Here's the highlights. 

So yesterday we went out to campus we had some time to re focus as a team and for ourselves.  My good friend/birthday twin Chris Denning led worship for us (which was awesome) and we had some time to reflect on what God has done and what we would like to see him do.  Spent some time re visiting some of the goals I have set for the summer/making new ones, and praying for a lot of stuff and a lot of people.

We went to our home campuses and Aaron and I teamed up.  We went outside to the beach area (kingsborough has a beach which is way cool) and looked for someone to do Soularium with.  I spotted a girl who looked like she might be muslim(by her dress) and I thought to myself hmm we should talk to her...and before I could even suggest it, Aaron was already making his way over to her.  So began to do the Soularium  survey.   we found out she was indeed a Muslim (big time).  Aaron and I both don't really know too much about the Muslim faith so we asked her tons of questions, and she told us sooooo much! it was really neat...she kept saying that there are a lot of similarities between Islam and Christianity.  To make a very long story short, we talked for like 2 hours...We did get to share the gospel with her a little bit just by explaining what we believe and how its different from Islam.  However she kept sort of interupting ( i dont think it was on purpose) and bringing it back to Islam so I figured there was no way we were going to get through the KnowingGodPersonally booklet with her so I wrote my information down on a KGP and gave it to her and said that I would love for her to read it because it expresses what we believe as Christ followers...She sort of started looking through it and said she would...and I know for a fact she really will read it...so even though the conversation didn't lead to any kind of decision, it was still an amazing conversation, she even said she believed she was meant to meat us and it was just really cool. 

Today we went to City Tech (the campus we usually can't get into).  We prayer walked for a bit, cuz we really wanted to get on campus and we prayed that we might find a way on.  So we had previously been told that if you "go to the admissions office" you can go in...so we asked to go...we did go for like 2 seconds but then we went to go talk to students :) God provided!  We approached a girl named Natasha.  We went through Soularium with her and through the questions, her answers, and us just dialoging with her we found out that she desired to know God.  We went through the KGP with her and she seemed really receptive...she acknowledged that she did not have Christ in her life and wanted it...but just as we were going through the last part her friend came up...which was cool...she was really nice and got to listen in on the convo...but when we asked Natasha if she wanted to give her life to Christ she said she did but she wanted to do it later...I am convinced that if her friend had not come up she would have accepted Christ...but I know that happened for a reason! We got both of their contact info and gave them ours and hope that that will not be our last conversation...be praying for them!

After that Jenny and I talked to a girl named Monika.  She is actually from Poland.  Again we busted out the Soularium.  She told us that she moved here when she was 13, she is married and has a little boy.  I am guessing she is around the age of 24ish.  When we got to the God questions she told us that her family is Roman Catholic and she only goes to church sometimes.  She is in the middle between believing and not believing, and she would like to know God but doesn't know how that happens and wants proof.  I asked her if we could share what we believed with her, she agreed and so I went through the KGP with her and Jenny and I tried to explain the gospel in a way that she would best understand.  She had a lot of questions...and said she knew some of the things we were telling her because of church.  We tried to explain that each of us have to make the decision for ourselves and that God can change us from the inside out.  It was such a good conversation and I really think Monika will eventually come to Christ...she was so close today...but we gave her our info, the KGP (she wanted to continue to look over it,process it, which is really good) and we gave her a copy of the book A Case For Christ...which was so perfect because this morning we were given a couple copies to hand out and isn't cool how God works and the person we gave ours to was someone who needs proof of Jesus :)

I was so encouraged by all of that yesterday and today but also frustrated.  I feel like ever since I have gotten here I have felt the battle between Christianity and religion.  For example the girl we talked to yesterday thought that Christians had to go through someone else to know God.  Monika thought that you have to go to church/be good and follow all of the rules to know God.  Monika comes from a Roman Catholic background...and while im not ragging on the Catholic church I am ragging on tradition.  We face the same thing in the south...people some how get the idea that all we have to do to get to heaven/know God is to go to church and try to be good.  And if these people are in church and still think this then something is wrong with how the church (AS A WHOLE) is presenting the gospel...catholic, baptist, methodist, whatever...it frustrates me that so many people think that they meet God's standard for good...why do so many miss the truth.  I think part of the issue is a lot of times we are afraid we are going to "offend" someone...well let me tell ya, the gospel IS OFFENSIVE...just look at Jesus...the truth he spoke offended people, stepped on toes, and called them out.  We are doing man kind more of an injustice by not truthfully exposing the gospel to what it really is as opposed to telling people what they want to hear and putting a big ole layer of sugar on it.

Yes People need to know that church is improtant, and that God loves him...but they also need to know that we can not earn salvation!  We can not do ANYTHING to earn God's love, or prove our goodness to him because we WILL FAIL!  We fall short...ALL OF US! We ALL come out of the womb a sinner and no matter how "good" we try to be we will always mess up!  Therefore we are unacceptable to have fellowship with God...but we are made ACCEPTABLE by the grace given by Jesus...God sacrificed himself to be the bridge...so that we can have fellowship and a relationship with him.  For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God (ephesians 2:8)

This miss understanding leaves people coming out of churches empty and confused as to why they can't feel God.  Leaving them wondering if he even exists.  I know many churches do an amazing job at making sure that people understand the gospel and God's requirement for us.  But it does frustrate me when I hear stories of people being taught distorted doctrine or believing the lies that satan has planted right under our noses.

Truth is that God longs to redeem us! to have a relationship with us, and to lead us to abundant life living for him.  All we have to do is ask him to come into our lives and surrender control to him...Revelation 3:20 says "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me."In Hebrew times, to eat with someone was very intimate, and was a sign of acceptance...when it says that he will come in and eat with us and us with him this means that he accepts us JUST AS WE ARE and all we have to do is invite him, accept him!then he does the rest...Accepting his grace means we no longer have to try to be good but he changes us from the inside out and we desire to live for him.  Thank God for GRACE. Im glad I gave my heart to Christ and not Religion.